I'm a Poet Now

My first
Poem……

Atmosphere?
Cigar,
Scotch,
Midnight moon.

Pencil?
Glossy red California Republic Palomino
Smooth write.

Paper?
Little black Moleskine.
Chatwin,
Van Gogh,
Edwards.

Words?
Tranquil,
Skelter,
Delve,
Trolley.

Trolley?

Everything is
Perfect.

King of Sleep

I am pretty awesome in real life, but I am even more awesome in my dreams. One time in my dreams I could swim over a mile without even getting tired. Another time I rhymed 7 other words with the word "cat", without even thinking about it. So I am going to try really really hard to be master and commander of my dreams so that I can always do these awesome things when I sleep. I sleep like 10 hours a night anyways, so I might as well be doing awesome things rather than just laying there doing nothing like an idiot.
But, if I am doing really awesome stuff in my dreams I have to be prepared to be supremely disappointed when I wake up. Because if I am a master rhymer or something in my sleep and I can rhyme like 7 words with cat, Ill be really pissed when I wake up and can only think of 4 or 5 words that rhyme. Or if I am just swimming a mile without even trying and I wake up and I don't even know if I can swim a mile without even trying in real life because there isn't a mile's worth of water anywhere around me to even try it out, well, then Ill be really pissed. Really, really pissed.

Swimming Trick

A fun trick is to go to your local community swimming pool with a whole load of weights hidden in your swim trunks and then go to the high dive and pretend to jump off, but really just throw the weights into the water and everyone will get splashed and then wonder who splashed them and not see anyone surface so they think that the person is drowning and they will go down there to look for him but they won't find him because they think they are looking for a really fat guy, but since you are the only one that knows what is really going on you can jump in to the rescue and grab some other random dude and be the hero.

Really, you're awesome

There are some truly, truly awesome people out there, but they just don't know it because they are too busy trying to be normal and healthy. So it is a good thing to do to run up to these people really fast and tell them really loud that they are really awesome and they don't know it. Like this one time I saw this old male nurse, and he was just walking along, not even realizing that he was really really awesome, so I ran up to him and shouted about his awesomeness to him and he suddenly realized and decided to walk the other way. I think it was kind of a symbolic gesture of him turning from his old, dull ways and pursuing a life of extraordinary feats and adventures.

Tricks

It is fun to play tricks on people, like telling them to stand next to you and then keep moving so they are running around and around and trying really hard to stand next to you while you keep moving until you both get so tired of running around that you just fall down exhausted and start laughing, and that is a good time to introduce yourself.

Frederick Douglass

Delicious Fruit

God elects people for Heaven, and there really isn't free will.
So one half of the debate goes.
But what about the Garden of Eden. Adam and Eve had free will. It was God's desire for them to live in perfect harmony with Him, but he gave them an option. They chose the bad option, and now I feel like we have to each make that choice on our own. Because if God makes it for us then there really wasn't any need for the fruit tree in Genesis.

Opposition

So I want to walk with God. I want to commune with Him throughout the day. There are times when I forget about this which probably happens because I am lazy and don't really focus my attention on him, or get distracted by things of the world. But there are other times when I am alone, focusing all of my energy on Him, and still I have trouble experiencing Him. I will get random thoughts about terrible things, or get bombarded by distracting thoughts, or sometimes just feel sick or get a headache. These things can't be coming from the world because I am alone and isolated from the world. They can't be coming from my sinful nature because I am trying with all my heart to find God. This is when I see evidence of Satan in my life. This is when I realize that there is much more going on around me than I realize, and that there is a war going on that I have been oblivious to. I don't want to blame everything on Satan or demons, but there are some times when there is no other option for what is oppressing me.

This is when a lot of Christians think that God is just not active in their life, because they seek him and there is still a fog. They think He just didn't show up. That also happened to Daniel when he sought God and there was a literal battle between angels and demons for 21 days before the angels could break through and answer Daniel. Now I'm not saying that happens all the time with us, but I also think "why not". Why doesn't that still happen? Satan is still at war with God and he is constantly prowling around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. And by "someone" the bible is referring to Christians.

Taken Out

I feel like I've been taken out.

At the end of the Wild at Heart conference I went to in Colorado I was on a spiritual high, and John Eldridge warned us that Satan would do everything he could to take us out, to make us complacent and lose the passion we had. I thought that was just for the weak Christians, but man he can really attack us without us knowing.

I had kind of a wake up call yesterday when I was sitting at my desk and daydreaming about stuff. I realized that I have been ineffective in my walk with Christ and how much I missed my deep fellowship and intimacy with Him that I used to have. I can't even remember when or how I lost it. I just got caught up in daily mundane business and lost my eternal perspective and didn't put enough time into my relationship with God.

The hardest part of the whole thing is that I feel like I used to be really really close with God, like he was so real and part of my life constantly, and now I miss that. I miss Him like I would miss seeing my best friends after a while, or after being away from Carly for a long time. But it is even more than that because I realize that it's my own stupid fault and that I don't have to miss Him. But now it's so hard to figure out how to get back to where I once was.

I just read the chapter in Waking the Dead yesterday about guarding your heart, and I realized that I haven't done anything for my heart, or even paid attention to it for a long time. In fact, it's been so long that I don't even know what I would like to do for my heart.

Holidays

This weekend was Easter Sunday, and it always gets me thinking about secular tradition on religious holidays. Christmas and Easter are the two main Christian holidays, and there is a lot of secular tradition for both, like Santa Clause and the Easter Bunny. I used to get me mad because I always thought that these stupid traditions always took the spotlight away from the real meaning behind the holiday and that people weren't realizing the full meaning of the occasion.
But, now I think it might actually be a good thing. I was playing frisbee golf with my family on Easter and I overheard two neighbors say "Happy Easter" to each other. My initial thought was that they probably didn't really mean it, and didn't really even celebrate the holiday for what it really means, the resurrection of Jesus. But then I started thinking.....how many people would actually celebrate Christmas and Easter if there was no Santa Clause, presents, Easter bunny, or Easter egg hunts? Not many people. They would be holidays that only a few christians would celebrate every year, and the majority of the population wouldn't give a rip.
But now, since we do have secular traditions associated with them, everyone celebrates these holidays, even if they don't believe in Jesus. Sure, they might be celebrating them for the wrong reasons, but at least they are still being immersed in the real meaning behind the holiday too. When their kids find out that Santa and the Easter Bunny aren't real, and start asking real questions to the true meaning of the holiday, there will have to be an answer. And that answer will always shine a spotlight on Jesus.

Physics

Here is an email I sent as a reply to Sam. I want to expand more on it because it is fascinating.

Thats crazy man. Really crazy. It got me thinking about physics.......

Its kind of crazy that we even pretend to have God figured out. Look at physics. Scientists have been studying physics for years, which is a physical thing that can be studied and repeated in physical labs, and scientists still have not figured it out. Here is my theory......

The closer an object gets to moving at 670 million mph (the speed of light), the slower time goes. As you approach the speed of light time barely exists at all. In fact, a black hole is a place where a huge mass is compacted so small that it sucks everything into it, including light, and time does not exist. The "event horizon" is the closest you can get to a black hole without getting sucked in, and inside the event horizon time does not exist. Anyways, I have written a little bit about light and why I think God literally is light (see my blog). But God is light. Light travels at 670 million mph, the speed at which there is no time. Everything just exists, and it is everywhere at the same time. Sounds a lot like God to me.

Also, the closer things get to the speed of light, the smaller they get. If you were travelling half the speed of light, you would be about 3'2" tall. So if you are going the speed of light, you literally are nothing, kind of like a black hole.

So, let's look at dimensions. We live in 3 dimensions. Its hard for us to comprehend a 2 dimensional world where everything would be flat, like on a piece of paper. And just as it would be impossible for us to explain what the third dimension (height) is to someone living in flatland, so it is impossible for us to comprehend a fourth dimension. Or a fifth dimension. As you increase dimensions, you start to close in on something being everywhere at once, and you also come back full circle to something less than one dimension, the 0 dimension, where there is just a dot. One single entity that is everywhere and everything all at the same time. Which sounds a lot like light. Light is practically a 4th dimension, and some physicists believe that light is the fourth dimension. This is why....

There is also balance that exists between dimensions. If you increase the length of an object, you have to decrease either the width or depth for it to remain composed of the same mass. It is confusing, but the same is true with light and mass. Things travelling at light speed take everything away from time and physical mass. Time just doesn't exist to it.

Light never ages.Light consumes all physical dimensions into one dimension of everything.Nothing can go faster than light, no matter how much you try to speed something up, it is physically and theoretically impossible to go faster than the speed of light.Light always approaches and recedes at the same rate, which defies all logical physics.
Dude, there are so many references to God being light in the bible. It says when the new heaven and earth are created we will not need the light of day because we will have the light of God. It says God is light, and light is a metaphor for goodness, and darkness is always evil. It is the basic way to explain God and Satan, good and evil, light and darkness.

One side note, scientists have no idea what a black hole is, but it sounds like the antithesis of light. It sucks everything into itself, (selfishness), and light does not exist there. Neither does time or space. Light is always giving, radiating, illuminating all things while exposing their true nature, (God), whereas a black hole is basically has the same properties as light, but for some reason it is opposite, it destroys everything in its sphere and sucks it into itself. Kind of creepy.